Monday, May 26, 2008

Everybody Wang Chung tonight

Yesterday I went to a Palma party. And I have one word to describe it: AWESOME! Holy fuck, my dear readers I love them.

I was supposed to meet Brittany at her house at 12:30 but being a lazy bum I woke up at noon so I jumped in the shower, got changed like seven times and was off. Luckily when I arrived at the Patchogue Palmas, Brittany wasn’t fully ready either. I sat around and played with Turtle until Brittany was ready to leave. That cat got hair all over me.

On the way to the party I got icing all over my vest which lead me to have to take to off…which I wasn’t too happy about. We got to the party and Brittany only gave me two rules: 1) speak like a white man not a black woman and 2) introduce myself to Nana.

While the Palma crew was filing in it was that awkward greeting time, You know? The whole party was boring compared to Loser. Seriously, I was kind of afraid to play this game when Brittany first told me about it. The rules of the game are really simple: all you have to do is catch the ball. One person kicks a beach ball into the yard and everyone has to catch it. The last person to catch a ball is the loser and you have to walk the walk of shame. Pretty simple right? Wrong. The only way I can fully describe this game is comparing it to feeding time at the zoo. You know when you go to a petting zoo and you put a quarter into the food machine and go to give your handful of food to that one goat that is being left out but as soon as you open your palm (kick the ball) the entire stock of goats rush over and knock each other out of the way for the food? That’s exactly how you play loser. All us goats run around the field to get the food.

I was really nervous that I would be declared loser, but I wasn’t…I think I did better than Brittany (really weird) the highlight of the game though, was when I was going for the ball and so was one of Brittany’s family members and we collided. I stayed where I was but she went flying and rolled on the ground. I felt really bad but the entire Palma crew burst out laughing. What made it even better was the woman I knocked over was a 30something lesbian who was blind in one eye. I look over to Brittany and there is her dad, laying on the floor, spread eagle crying…I think this means I was accepted into the Palma clan.

Overall, I had an awesome time and I can’t wait to go to another Palma get together.

Saturday, May 10, 2008

I need high Ceilings.

I hate people. I hate that they are so…retarded. I hate that we take advantage of each other and just assume that we don’t mind cleaning up your shit. I’m talking, of course, about the customers of good old Kay Bee Toys. Yes, it is our job to clean the store. Yes, it is our job to help you when you need it. Yes, it is our job to try to be as helpful as possible, but NO! It isn’t our goddamned job to pick up after you and your goddamn kids who throw their shit around like they own the place and you stand there on your goddamn Bluetooth chatting away to your fat girlfriend who is sitting home watching reruns of Sex and the City with a gallon of ice cream in her mouth. I swear, one day at work I will flip out on someone. Mark my words.

On a lighter note:

I was in Shop rite yesterday with my mom and we were by the meats. I look around and read some of the labels of the bags while my mom looks at beef and pork. I hear my mom talking to someone so I focus my attention back to her; she’s talking to an old man about coupons. From what I got the man goes through the store’s flyer and cuts out the coupons and sticks them in the things that are on sale, giving whoever finds it a coupon. I thought that was really really nice of him. When they finished talking he went to push his cart away and caught my eye. I gave him a wide smile and he stopped walking. Without knowing who I was he turned to my mom, tapped her on the shoulder and told her to have a happy mother’s day. My heart skipped a beat, this guy didn’t even know I was her son, didn’t know that she had kids but he did know. It was weird. I felt like giving the guy a hug because of what he said, because of the coupon thing he did. This man was generally a nice person, someone who is extremely rare to find these days.

I was riding shot gun with my hair undone.

Did you ever notice how some cars are just like their owners? It’s weird. I was driving home from school the other day, singing to ‘our song’ by Taylor Swift (because I can’t stop listening to it) and I was at the light of north ocean and Woodside and I looked to my right and there was a heavy butch brunette with a leather jacket on rocking out to 80’s metal music. I looked at her car; she was driving a bright red corvette. I thought it suited her just fine. I smiled and continued to sing. As I drove home I thought about my car. Did it suit me? I think so. My car is white on the outside and grayish tan on the inside. It’s simple and not flashy at all. Three hubcaps are missing and there is a scratch on the front bumper. On the inside there is a clutter of papers and water bottles everywhere. You’ll usually find empty star bucks cups and paper plates from the previous week. There is no tape player, no CD player, and the fan belt squeaks when I drive (begging for attention ‘look at me look at me’ like I am when I walk into a room). I don’t need the CD player because I have my ipod and an adapter for the radio. I think that my car fits my personality. Sure I’d like a flashy black dodge neon with black interior and a working radio, but I think my car’s pretty chill right now.
I started thinking my theory with my friends. Brittany’s CRV is just like her; kind of hard looking at first glance, but as you look longer you notice the elegance of it. The blue balances out the shape of the car. The sides of the car have dents in it from being mishandled. You open the door and BAM! A whole lot of shit happens at once; there is paper all over the place, used cups on the floor, gum stuck in compartments, crumpled up doodles, bags of popcorn, a portfolio, a box from build-a-bear left there since February, and clothes in the backseat. At first one might think this is chaos, but once you drive in it you understand that it is her. A lot of shit happened in that car…a lot of shit exploded *giggles* in that car, and once you get past the first layer you see the awesomeness and softness of the CRV (that is of course, you have air in your tires and check the breaks…

Chunk is Fran. If Fran was a car she’d be Chunk. There’s something about that dodge neon that just screams Fran. Maybe it’s because its name is chunk (and only Fran could get away with naming her car that) or maybe it’s because that car kind of grew up with Fran, Melany, and me since she got it; at first it was all like “cool! A car, let’s go out and do stuff because we’re teenagers” now it’s “I need to drive to work and then we can chill at the park after dark”…not saying that Fran is dull and works, but we know to put work and responsibilities before some stuff. I think that the shape of Chunk is kind of like the way you would shape Fran; not saying Fran is awkward and round, but cool, and free flowing. Dodge neon’s are such cool cars, they really are. What makes Chunk even more awesome is that it is a fucking AWESOME blue; a neon is usually a girly car, but the blue spices it up a little and adds that spunk and extra umm…coolness to the car, like Fran who can be very girly, but she also be very laid back and ‘what ever’ if you know what I mean.

There isn’t much to say about Jen’s car though. I look at it and think: Blonde. I look at Jen and think: Blonde. If you don’t know who Jen is (and you should because Jen’s the coolest Aries ever) you will know exactly what I mean by blonde; not stupid and sluttish, but bubbly and awesome. Jen’s car is not the one we all use all the time (because that girl is always working) but when we do we have a hella time.

Thursday, May 1, 2008

miles away.

Hmm… I’m bored. Super bored. So bored that I punched myself in the jaw and now my jaw hurts. That’s how bored I am. No one is online so I can’t talk to anyone. Brittany’s at school, so I can’t text her, Fran’s out with her Hofstra crew, Bffl is working, Jen is working. No one is around for little ol me. I went to target after school today. I bought my mom the new Madonna CD which I’m listening to right now. It’s okay. I like some of her older stuff better, but what can you do? I bought myself another mattress foam thing so now my bed is extra extra comfortable. I also bought a pack of four energy drinks and I’m down to one. I still can’t find my damn camera. I think I might have thrown it out by accident which really really blows black dick because I had a memory card in there, and rechargeable batteries. What else is new with me? Today is my dads birthday. He worked and got home around sevenish…we had cake and now my family is watching 1000 BC, which my dad got on bootleg. Oh, wanna hear a joke Zack told me? Question: a girl with big boobs worked where? Hooters. A man with one leg works where? I-hop. It’s stupid but funny.

Right now I am wearing socks and flip flops. Why? Because I had socks on but I wanted to get my portfolio from my car so I just threw on some flip flops and I have yet to take them off…I’m such a shoebee…is that how you spell it? Je ne sais pas. I was never really a fan of Rocket Power.
Wow, I have nothing really to write. Hm….blah. I wish Brittany was here. I really want her to sleep over this weekend. I’ve only been asking like every weekend but she’s been “busy”…avoiding me. Just kidding. I can’t wait for the summer break. I CAN’T FUCKING WAIT! I’m so over school right now. I have two more tests in my math class, and a final, and then I’m done with that. I need to make a power point and finish my bobble head project for my 3-d design class, finish my mood, reflection, and hate drawings, and start my life size self portrait for my drawing class, and read Bright lights, big city for my English class. God, I wish it was summer. Energy drinks are sooooo good. Madonna’s cd isn’t as good as this fucking drink. I want to dance. Dance wild, drunk without a care. Fuck me I’m bored!

I can’t wait for Sunday!!!! Why?!? Because I’m going to my aunt Diane and uncle Frannie’s house for a partaaay! I hope Brittany comes with us. My mom said she’s going to yell at her if she doesn’t =) oh Lachele. Wow, it’s been forever since frAAn called her that. Anyway the partaaay: I can’t wait. It’s just a BBQ for my cousin’s communion, but I haven’t seen that side of the family since July of last year. That’s the awesome side of the family (because we’re not really related to them…it’s my Grandma’s brother’s wife’s side of the family). I really hope Brittany comes because I want her to meet the awesome side of my family. They’re loud and energetic, unlike my blood relatives who sit there and ignore everyone else. I can’t wait to laugh and talk with aunt Diane and get into heated debates about st. patty’s day again. Damn, I finished my energy drink. I don’t think it’d be healthy if I drank the other one though. Four in a seven hour period might not be that good for me.

I want another tattoo, of what, I don’t know. My nose just got stuffy *shakes head* anyway, back to tattoos; I want another one *burp* I do. Last night I drew a dark mark on my forearm and it’s AWESOME! I want one for real real. I want it black and acid green. Fucking werd. I want to draw. Bye.