Yesterday I went to a Palma party. And I have one word to describe it: AWESOME! Holy fuck, my dear readers I love them.
I was supposed to meet Brittany at her house at 12:30 but being a lazy bum I woke up at noon so I jumped in the shower, got changed like seven times and was off. Luckily when I arrived at the Patchogue Palmas, Brittany wasn’t fully ready either. I sat around and played with Turtle until Brittany was ready to leave. That cat got hair all over me.
On the way to the party I got icing all over my vest which lead me to have to take to off…which I wasn’t too happy about. We got to the party and Brittany only gave me two rules: 1) speak like a white man not a black woman and 2) introduce myself to Nana.
While the Palma crew was filing in it was that awkward greeting time, You know? The whole party was boring compared to Loser. Seriously, I was kind of afraid to play this game when Brittany first told me about it. The rules of the game are really simple: all you have to do is catch the ball. One person kicks a beach ball into the yard and everyone has to catch it. The last person to catch a ball is the loser and you have to walk the walk of shame. Pretty simple right? Wrong. The only way I can fully describe this game is comparing it to feeding time at the zoo. You know when you go to a petting zoo and you put a quarter into the food machine and go to give your handful of food to that one goat that is being left out but as soon as you open your palm (kick the ball) the entire stock of goats rush over and knock each other out of the way for the food? That’s exactly how you play loser. All us goats run around the field to get the food.
I was really nervous that I would be declared loser, but I wasn’t…I think I did better than Brittany (really weird) the highlight of the game though, was when I was going for the ball and so was one of Brittany’s family members and we collided. I stayed where I was but she went flying and rolled on the ground. I felt really bad but the entire Palma crew burst out laughing. What made it even better was the woman I knocked over was a 30something lesbian who was blind in one eye. I look over to Brittany and there is her dad, laying on the floor, spread eagle crying…I think this means I was accepted into the Palma clan.
Overall, I had an awesome time and I can’t wait to go to another Palma get together.